I’ve been mostly quiet lately. Taking the time that I mentioned I needed to just kinda be with my own thoughts. 

It not as peaceful as it sounds 😅 It’s more like structured chaos. 

I mentioned a while back that I’ve been practicing sleep-thinking with more intention, which led to a snippet of sleep-seeing. Since then, I learned that when I ground myself beforehand, it’s actually much more productive. 

But I also learned that things coming in clearer and faster means I have less time in my sleeping state to make them make sense. When I sleep-think, I use the night to work out whatever it is. Sleep-seeing is more visual and it’s just lots of pictures, like a slide show moving almost faster than my brain can compute what I’m actually seeing. Although, I’m pretty sure the speed can be somewhat controlled…I just don’t know how…yet. 

So I’ve gone from sleep-thinking and problem-solving in my sleep, waking up with the answer…To now sleep-seeing and waking up with all these visuals etched into my mind…but no immediate answer. I wasn’t happy about it at first.

Over a few weeks of doing this and getting a little better at it each time, I realized that I’m supposed to reflect on the actual meaning of these visuals AFTER I’m awake. But that’s also kind of an issue because during my waking time, my brain is going 1,000 miles an hour. That’s the whole reason I sleep-think to begin with. Because my brain is more quiet during sleep-thinking.

So that led me to try out a meditative type of approach.

Now mind you, my meditative state is NOT like the type they try to teach you on YouTube. There’s no way my brain is ever gonna just be silent, or still and empty. There’s no way it’s not gonna have at least one feral monkey running around in it while I’m trying to focus and center myself. 

It was frustrating trying to mediate. And I’m pretty sure that completely defeats the entire purpose of actual meditation. So I decided that even with that crazy monkey popping up into my brain, it’s still MY meditative state. I can shoo the monkey away for a bit and refocus. The monkey and the shooing doesn’t mean the meditation was a bust. It just means my meditation doesn’t look like the text book version. 

My approach was to look at the notes I’ve taken of these visuals I see in sleep-seer space and retain them at the back of my mind while the ‘front’ of my mind focuses on meditating. 

I start by picturing a flat screen tv directly in front of me. On a white wall. Idk why, but I just do. The white wall makes it easier to focus on the black tv I guess. I just keep that tv in my ‘sight’ and once in a while that weird little monkey starts poking its head into my view (btw, this ‘monkey’ is a metaphor for literally any random distraction). 

I shoo him away but without giving him any attention. My attention stays focused on the TV. After a few mins the monkey pops up less and less. And eventually, maybe 10 mins in, no more feral monkey. He’s still there, but he’s chill. Just kinda hanging around now to see what’s going on. Meaning he’s still a distraction, but a manageable one.

That’s when I’m ready and the TV clicks on. The screen contains the visuals. I can focus on them, swipe through them, and most importantly FEEL them and what they mean.  Like a voice in the back of my mind, making it all make sense. 

The energy of it feels dense, layered, and so complex it’s almost overwhelming. So it’s taken me a bit to get better at not losing my focus. My higher self shows me the messages in flashes, like scattered pieces of a puzzle waiting to be assembled. 

But these flashes aren’t random tho…they are deliberate, each holding a piece of the bigger picture…the truth. 

For example, one night I was shown a glowing silver thread stretching out endlessly into the dark…the sharp image of a mirror reflecting my own face but somehow not my face….a door that seemed to pulse with light and then vanish…the number 14, and lots of other stuff.

It all feels disconnected at first, like cryptic postcards. But when I sit with these pieces, in my meditative state…me and my monkey…staring at the TV…it all comes together like a short film. 

When my higher self showed me an image of silver threads extending from me…threads glowing and vibrating with energy. At first, I didn’t fully understand what it meant. 

But as I sat with it later, in my mind’s TV, I realized these threads represented my connection to other dimensions, stretching across timelines and realities, and some even connecting to other me’s.

The visual of the threads wasn’t just symbolic…it was a direct reflection of how my soul exists in multiple places at once, serving as an anchor point between dimensions. In some visions where these threads were connected to other me’s, they were different versions of me existing in parallel realities, walking their own paths, but the barrier separating them from me looks worn down. I can tell the barrier is there, but it’s tattered and thin like an old worn curtain in a dilapidated house. And when the wind blows just right, it creates an opening, a clear undistorted view of what’s on the other side. 

I also kept seeing the number 14 in these flashes, and it felt heavy with significance. It would appear on doorways, carved into surfaces, and kinda glowing faintly in the distance. As I pieced it together later, I realized it was tied to a part of my life where I struggled with some things..and at that time my energy sorta zapped, and that old curtain between dimensions blew right open. 

The mirror where I saw myself…but not quite myself…It was another version of me, slightly distorted but undeniably me. In the sleep-seer space it felt jarring and uncanny and when it fell to the floor and shattered into dozens of pieces, some pieces scattered to opposite sides of the room, while other pieces ended up overlapping each other. 

In my TV mind, I realized it was a reflection of my multidimensional self. It was a symbol of how my energy exists across realities, overlapping and intersecting in ways that show up in my current lifetime. The other “me’s”

I guess I’ve learned that these visions are layered and not meant to make perfect sense in the moment. 

Sleep-seer space provides me with the raw material. But it’s in my meditative state, as I reflect on them, that the full picture comes together. Then there’s the narration going on in the back of my mind. It’s so hard to describe in words, and the only one that I can think of is…telepathy. The voice is there, telling me the story, but no actual words are being used. It’s just something I know to be true.

The journey this past month hasn’t just been a process of how to receive the message…it was about learning how to sit still and be quiet while my inner (or higher) self reads me the story.

I’ve also come to the realization that I can gather all the me’s and have myself a Me meeting. I know it sounds strange, but I’m certain that the more awareness I bring to my multidimensional table, the more control I’ll have over it. If I can get deep enough into my meditation, without that damn money, and imagine myself standing in a circle with my other versions, I can ask them what they need, why they’re crossing into this timeline. I’m aware now that sometimes these bleed-throughs happen because another version of me is trying to communicate something important. 

I’m just not there yet, and I’m really not in any hurry to get there either. I want the answers to a lot of things. Like the unexplained things I blog about here.

I know now, for certain, that the old tattered curtain in that dilapidated house doesn’t just allow the me’s to cross over. There are other things, sitting in wait, for the wind to blow that curtain open so they can also pass through. (the knocking, the banging, the thing in my doorway….aka THE FOG) The curtain allows the fog to blow in.

And I know now that I’ve spent a whole lot of years and a whole lot of energy looking for the WHY, while completely disregarding the fact that I have the power and the ability to just make it stop. 

So that’s something else I’ve been focusing on. Cleaning the energy around here, protecting my home, grounding myself, creating physical barriers (like repairing the window instead of just replacing the curtain) and closing a lot of doors that I’ve left open in my past that has allowed other things to find their way inside. 

I think by doing this, the unsettling nature of things around here will improve. And THEN I can spend some time in Sleep Seer space in the past tense…figuring out ‘what was all that about?’ 

I just know the answers won’t come until I’ve cleaned, repaired, and restored the dilapidated house.

It also turns out that it’s much easier and less exhausting to find answers for other people than it is for myself. Unpacking things for others (while neglecting to unpack for myself) has always come naturally for me anyway. I just didn’t realize I could help them unpack like this. 

So while I work on unlearning, unpacking, and restoring my own self…it feeds my soul to find answers for others. And my soul needs all the nourishment it can get.